Alan's blog........

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stuart13
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by stuart13 » Sun Jun 04, 2017 8:03 am

Plane speaking only.

:wink:

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Janey Dal
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by Janey Dal » Sun Jun 04, 2017 11:54 am

Alan (whose blog this is) has instructed Jane to try to raise the level of the blog from the gutter where Mike and Paul are trying to drag it.

Stuart is not exempt from this instruction because, whilst Stuart's references are at least clean, his jokes are abominable :P :P .

Alan wants everyone to know that this blog is an intellectual blog (Alan doesn't read it obviously :shock: :shock: ) and that is the only level he will allow or he will spit his dummy out and remove his name from the blog.

Jane wants everyone to know that Alan is actually a pussy cat and won't do anything at all about the blog (even if he knew it existed :oops: :oops: ).

Meanwhile Jane took Harry the Jack Russell Terror out for his constitutional - Alan still being a little limp :shock: :shock:. Sorry! Jane meant having a little limp :oops: :oops:.

Jane doesn't want anybody to ask 'a little limp what?'. This would be totally inappropriate for this blog. :shock: :shock:

Jane suddenly realised that in the midst of the wedding planning frenzy (only 2 months to go) Jane had forgotten absolutely who was going to look after poor Harry :oops: :oops: .

Luckily Jane has managed to house Harry for two overnights at a dog minder's. A snip at 25 quid per night :shock: :shock: . Jane thinks it would be cheaper to buy him an outfit and turn him into a page dog for the wedding :lol: :lol: .

Meanwhile as a result of this Harry has a 'meet and greet' with his dog minder in 2 weeks time :roll: :roll: . Jane thinks the world is completely insane.

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paul.m
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by paul.m » Mon Jun 05, 2017 6:19 am

I thought that was what Stu ,Mike and I were doing raising this to gutter level some people are just not satisfied
Paul

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Janey Dal
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by Janey Dal » Sat Jun 10, 2017 12:15 pm

Jane will set Alan on you Paul :lol: :lol: . Mind he's 3 stone wet through so don't worry too much :shock: :shock: .

Meanwhile Jane has had a very interesting week. One of Jane's GPs stood as the local Labour candidate in the election on Thursday and got elected! :shock: :shock: . Nobody, including the GP/MP, believed this would happen, which meant that nobody had done any contingency planning and Jane is now a GP down :shock: :shock: .

And to add further strangeness to the whole proceedings, the GP/MP is Jane's local MP. Indeed Jane voted for him. So Jane has been effectively hoist with her own petard :roll: :roll: .

Jane could never stand her local MP who was a pompous ass. And indeed Jane advised him of this in an email once :lol: :lol: . However now Jane has to try to find a GP at short notice to cover for the GP/MP who is sallying off to Westminster as we speak, so to speak, as it were.

Jane has forewarned her new MP ex-GP that she will be writing to him on a regular basis to demand answers to unanswerable questions and generally making his life a misery :lol: :lol: .

Jane wonders if Mike fancies a few weeks as a locum working for Jane? Excellent rates of pay, a practically perfect Practice Manager and cake :D :D .

And to add to all this excitement and general goings-on - Jane has been in her post for a year now and has been offered a pay rise :D :D .

Obviously,given the state of the NHS currently, Jane turned this down.

NOT! :lol: :lol:

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stuart13
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by stuart13 » Sat Jun 10, 2017 10:48 pm

Time flies when you are having fun.

After a difficult few years, I'm so very pleased that your work life is more settled for you, Jane.

:) xx

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Shining_Peace
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by Shining_Peace » Sun Jun 11, 2017 12:16 am

Congratulations to your GP/MP!!

Congratulations with your pay raise!!
~Sassy

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Janey Dal
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by Janey Dal » Sun Jun 11, 2017 11:41 am

Jane thanks Sassy and Stuart for their kind words. Jane has to say it wasn't a HUGE payrise but in these days of austerity it is satisfactory and given how much GPs like to watch the pennies, quite a compliment :D :D .

Jane has to say that of course she hasn't let loose the full force of her personality on them as yet :shock: :shock: . Jane obviously would like to keep this job until she retires.

Jane has had in interesting couple of days watching her ex-GP MP on the TV saying interesting things. Jane sits there thinking "I knew him when he had nowt!" Although in truth he will have taken a pay cut to become an MP. Mind he's hardly going to be on the breadline!

He may however have one of the shortest ex-GP MP roles in history, given the current state of the government. Jane can see him back in 6 months begging for his job back! Ooooh the power! :lol: :lol:

Jane in 6 months: "Did you, during your time as my parliamentary representative, achieve a 200% payrise for practice managers? No? Oh dear!".

"Did you, during your time as my parliamentary representative, achieve the provision of a Brad Pitt look-a-like for every hard working woman in your constituency to use as they wished for chores and other activities? No? Oh dear again!"

"Did you, during your time as my parliamentary representative, achieve the services of a young naked man to do all the painting and decorating for the aforementioned women? (Jane is not so bothered about looks for this one as the decorator's face will be facing the wall at all times. A cute bottom is a must though :oops: ). No? And you want your job back? ". :twisted: :twisted:

Jane will have to start writing to him immediately to ensure he has at least the time to attempt to achieve these goals.

Nobody can accuse Jane of being unfair. :shock: :shock:

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MikeyB
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by MikeyB » Sun Jun 11, 2017 6:53 pm

Nice offer Jane. I haven't been a GP since 1992. Has anything changed?

Mike x

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stuart13
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by stuart13 » Sun Jun 11, 2017 9:47 pm

Computers and the 'paperless' revolution.

:wink:

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paul.m
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by paul.m » Mon Jun 12, 2017 7:26 pm

If Jane can only find nice young naked ladies to do the painting can I hold there steps still wouldn't want them to wobble and fall off
Paul

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Janey Dal
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by Janey Dal » Fri Jun 16, 2017 8:45 pm

MikeyB wrote:
Sun Jun 11, 2017 6:53 pm
Nice offer Jane. I haven't been a GP since 1992. Has anything changed?

Mike x
The cake is much better.

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Janey Dal
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by Janey Dal » Fri Jun 16, 2017 8:46 pm

paul.m wrote:
Mon Jun 12, 2017 7:26 pm
If Jane can only find nice young naked ladies to do the painting can I hold there steps still wouldn't want them to wobble and fall off
PAUL! :shock: :shock:

Which bits were you thinking might wobble?

Just so Jane gets an idea of what size ladder to buy, obviously :shock:

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Janey Dal
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by Janey Dal » Sat Jun 17, 2017 11:11 am

Stuart is of course, quite right! GP practice are now expected to be paper-light :shock: :shock: . Evidently the bureaucrats who decided this have not seen Jane's desk :oops: :oops: . And indeed Jane's practice uses computers for everything! Including a Bluetooth ECG machine :shock: :shock: .

In fact Jane has to admit to her shame that when the NHS suffered from the cyber attack a couple of weeks ago Jane couldn't even ring anybody because all the phone numbers were stored on her computer :shock: :shock: .

Meanwhile Jane is basking in the sun today - or she will be when she recovers from Harry's constitutional! Jane returned from aforementioned constitutional somewhat sweaty and non-fragrant :oops: :oops: . Not helped by Jane stuffing Harry's poop-scoop bag down her cleavage to leave her hands free :shock: .

Jane has to point out here that that was prior to it being used :shock: :shock: :shock: .

And Jane would like to say, having watched the news avidly over the last few weeks - isn't Theresa May doing well? Jane thinks she is so glad she was appointed as Prime Minister :shock: :shock: .

She is so overwhelmingly popular with both the public and her own party Jane doesn't know how she copes with it all :lol: :lol:. Jane suspects even her husband is sleeping in the spare room :lol: :lol: .

But obviously as a country we are busy being strong and stable - pity about the politicians :shock:

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Janey Dal
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by Janey Dal » Sun Jun 18, 2017 10:26 am

Jane had an interesting visit from mad Ma yesterday. Mad Ma 'popped in' around 12 noon and ended up staying until 9 pm :shock: :shock:, had her tea and generally made herself at home :roll: :roll: .

This actually worked out quite well for Jane who has been tasked with cutting out tiny butterflies and hearts out of coloured card to sprinkle on the tables for VERY intelligent daughter's forthcoming nuptials :roll: :roll: .

Has Jane's reader any idea how many tiny butterflies and hearts it takes to decorate 8 tables :shock: :shock: ?

Bloody loads! :shock: :shock: . Jane and mad Ma spent about 2 hours cutting them out and still only ended up with a pathetic number barely enough to sprinkle on a saucer let alone a table :shock: :shock: .

Jane has nobody to blame but herself having offered to help VERY intelligent daughter where she can. Jane is starting again today but has a feeling that she is going to get heartily sick of tiny butterflies and hearts very, very quickly. :roll:

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stuart13
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by stuart13 » Sun Jun 18, 2017 1:07 pm


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