Alan's blog........

Chat about anything you like... Fed up with the state of the world today? Tell us!
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Jane Dalgleish
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Post by Jane Dalgleish » Fri Jan 08, 2010 6:21 am

...................Give him the TV remote ........................ :shock: :shock: I don't think so.................. :shock: :shock:

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Saxie
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Post by Saxie » Fri Jan 08, 2010 6:43 am

Give him a kiss and a cuddle from me - if you can manage a hip wiggle you can tell him it's from the kiwi bellydancer - on second thoughts, maybe better not excite him too much or he'll be grabbing all the nurses
Cheers
Lynne

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rayhunt
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Post by rayhunt » Fri Jan 08, 2010 6:57 am

I think we should consider a thread "HOW TO TRAIN A WIFE WHEN YOU GET HOME FROM HOSPITAL"

EXAMPLE

1} See that he is seated comfortably in the lounge facing the TV
a) That he is warm
b) That he has the remote
c) That he has all the latest magazines and newspapers at his finger tips
d) That his feet are massaged every hour to maintain good cirulation.
e) That he is given a fresh cup of tea/coffee every two hours at least
f) If still suffering greatly from pain he can remain in the chair and be spoon fed.

That should give you an idea how the thread should develop. Alan can be our guinea pig for all these trials as they are tested out by Jane. Just imagine what we could achieve for thousands of other patients.

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Jane Dalgleish
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Post by Jane Dalgleish » Fri Jan 08, 2010 6:59 am

Just rang the hossie and he's fine - they have had to sort out his pain relief but they say he's fine now. The operation went well and I can go and see him this morning so will report back.

Phew and double phew!!

Do you people who've had an op realise what you put us through?

Lynne I promise I will try the hip wiggle although as a non-belly dancer I'm not sure what the outcome will be and I VERY much doubt it will be sexy enough for him to grab any nurses!! Maybe we'll come and visit and you can do it in person!

Jane

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Saxie
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Post by Saxie » Fri Jan 08, 2010 7:11 am

Sounds good. I'll even let you have a donkey ride

Cheers
Lynne

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Jane Dalgleish
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Post by Jane Dalgleish » Fri Jan 08, 2010 7:15 am

But Ray I treat Alan like that when he isn't ill :roll: :roll:

The only thing I can add to that is that I could always perform all these tasks for him whilst naked. Although I won't know if his nausea is due to the post operative recovery then will I? :roll: :roll:

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rayhunt
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Post by rayhunt » Fri Jan 08, 2010 7:18 am

Hey..... Calling all men,,,,, LET'S MARY JANE!

foot massage...........ahhhhhhhh!

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Jane Dalgleish
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Post by Jane Dalgleish » Fri Jan 08, 2010 9:17 am

You'll wait 'til you're asked :P :P :P

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Jane Dalgleish
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Post by Jane Dalgleish » Fri Jan 08, 2010 3:50 pm

Been to see Alan today - he looked pretty good but was extremely p***** off because his epidural had failed and he had been in agony until they realised. So not a happy bunny. Nevertheless apart from a humungous scar he looked pretty fine. They had him on the PCA morphine. So not a happy experience for him but hopefully that will improve.

He's had 50% of his pancreas removed as it was completely useless but Mr C told him that there was nothing unexpected and that everything had gone to plan. I asked the nurse about diabetes. She said his blood sugars had been fine and Mr C hadn't mentioned anything so we are assuming that he has escaped that for the time being at least. So that's a positive.

Relief here and feel better for seeing him even though all he did was grump about everything, but I think that is the drugs, the loss of confidence due to the pain overnight and the fact that he's a 50+ male and is only happy when complaining.

Onwards and upwards. Car was only £150 - phew! Well not a massive phew but a huge relief after thinking it was going to be £500!

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stuart13
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Post by stuart13 » Fri Jan 08, 2010 4:06 pm

Heading in the right direction Jane.

Best wishes to you both.

Stu :)

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Jane Dalgleish
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More blog..............

Post by Jane Dalgleish » Fri Jan 08, 2010 4:10 pm

Jane and her trusty son Tom set off for the hossie at 11am. The weather was pretty bad and Jane thought there was a blizzard, this turned out not to be so as on arrival at the Freeman it transpired that Tom's windscreen wash had frozen hence the poor visibility. Tom expressed the opinion on several occasions on the way there that every single driver was a complete idiot. Jane thinks statistically that this is unlikely.

They arrived at the hospital and eventually found ITU which was named CCU in an attempt by the NHS to deter visitors. Had Jane and Tom known it was so far to walk Jane would have packed a flask and some sandwiches.

On arrival it was much like Star Trek in that buttons had to be pressed and a secret password spoken into an intercom before gaining entry. Jane's was Alan Dalgleish. Luckily she had practised this.

Alan looked quite interesting for once, with tubes sticking in places that couldn't be seen and only imagined. Someone with a sense of humour had stuck sticky tape on the end of his nose and hooked some tubes over his ears. Those nurses are such fun! Alan had the most interesting sticky tape all over his tummy. Jane wanted to pull this off as a joke, but this was considered by Alan to be "not the done thing in here". So she refrained.

At one point Jane was sitting down talking to the nurse. Alan started shouting "Oy!Oy! OY!" "What on earth is the matter darling" enquired Jane in some confusion. Jane was apparently inadvertently pressing the button for his positionable bed with her knee and Alan was going up and down with his head and feet :oops: :oops: Jane thought this was funny, Alan apparently wasn't so sure.

Alan had some lovely pink squashy lollipops by the side of his bed, but refused to share which Jane thought was a bit mean, as she had had to put on a stupid plastic apron in order to sit with him. Jane thinks the nurse thought Jane might be sick and the apron was provided to save Jane's clothes. Jane thought this was a lovely gesture, especially as Alan was being mean with his lollipops.

Jane and Tom didn't stay long as Alan was being rude and mean and kept falling asleep. Jane thinks Alan hasn't one single manner. Jane is a little disappointed with the operation as she hoped Alan would have a partial personality transplant at the same time and turn into someone not so grumpy, however, apparently Mr Charnley hadn't been able to do this part. Apparently the grumpy bit was too big to remove.

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stuart13
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Post by stuart13 » Fri Jan 08, 2010 4:47 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

:wink:

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leather_ferret
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Post by leather_ferret » Fri Jan 08, 2010 5:17 pm

What a hoot,

you really should write for a living :lol: :lol:

By 'eck I remember the bit where you wake up and the epidural is not working.

They took some convincing my my full flat out bull roar seemed to do tha job in the end. Mine worked on one side only ... the wrong side hehe :? . They left it in and stuffed me full of morphine on top - talk about spaced out :shock: !

So glad to hear hat all has gone well and that, in the end, it was worth all that waiting and worrying.

Pass on my best wishes to Alan and tell him not to behave himself, but just enjoy all those lovely young Nurses fussin over him

be good and be lucky

Dave

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Anne Dawson
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Post by Anne Dawson » Fri Jan 08, 2010 5:27 pm

Pleased to hear that Alan has come through the operation OK and is on the road to recovery.
It's early days yet - quite a bit more pain and grumbling to come I think.
Best Wishes,
Anne

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Jane Dalgleish
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Post by Jane Dalgleish » Fri Jan 08, 2010 5:51 pm

Bless him! He was lovely one minute and full of hell the next. Nobody knew what they were doing apparently, he'd got tubes where he didn't want them, he moved his oxygen thing cos it was irritating him and I made him put it back, the bed was up, down, round and goodness knows where!!!

And I really, really did move him up and down with my knee! :oops: :oops: God I cause trouble wherever I go.

I assume however his mood is partially drugs and partially that he had had a bad night with the pain relief. And I have only had minor surgery but I know that feeling of simply feeling like s*** afterwards.

Great news though that he is going back on the ward - it tells me that he is doing just fine. My main worry at the moment is my inability to visit him every day. But I need to consider not only the weather (I would not have been happy driving today on my own) but the distance.

I intend to visit him every other day, work will give me the time for this - so I go into work every other day for a full day, and every other day for a half day - this day I will leave at 12 and go and visit Alan - if you follow me. When he is discharged I will take holidays to be with him for at least a week. Does that sound sensible to those who have been through the op? I know the days I can't visit will be long for him, but he will get time to rest and I really can't manage going everyday - it's just that bit too far. And I can't just take time off work without reason, they are really good but I've staff to consider. It's not fair on them.

Its the usual, pulled in too many directions at the same time!!! :roll: :roll: :roll: Worry, worry, worry :roll: :roll: :roll:

AND! I'm cold in bed :shock: :shock:

Sadly Dave I hope the nurses on the ward are better for him, the one in ITU was lovely but, well you couldn't lust after her, even dosed up with morphine :shock: :shock:

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