It has been known . Jane can't remember when but there must have been at least one occasion .......
Okay. Maybe not .
So today Jane is going to kill Alan (whose blog this is) slowly and painfully by hitting him repeatedly with a teaspoon . Alan has a cold aka triple COVID 19 (is that then COVID 57? ). So as a result he is huffing and puffing, moaning and groaning. He huffs and groans his way into the kitchen and then puffs and moans his way back out and is generally feeling sorry for himself. .
Well somebody has to feel sorry for him . Jane needs her mad Mad to come and visit to give Alan sympathy. Actually, Jane will rephrase that - ALAN needs mad Ma to come over . Alan is cross with Jane because she is not doing sympathy. Alan has been married to Jane for 16 years (and coincidentally Jane has been married to Alan for the same length of time ) and should know better. Alan accused Jane of giving sympathy to everybody but him. Well he's mistaken there! Jane has NEVER done sympathy .
Jane didn't even do sympathy with her offspring. Jane and sympathy should never be two words that exist in the same sentence .
Anyway Alan has gone back to bed with a cross face on (Alan, not the bed). Jane is working hard once again doing Alan's blog for him and will shortly go and watch a plethora of JJ .
But Jane thinks this is grossly unfair! The gate needs work and the porch walls needs sanding down! AND Jane has had to go shopping again . And Alan is feeling cross?
He needs to be in Jane's shoes for a day .
Actually this is not a good idea: a) Jane's shoes are 3 sizes smaller than Alan's and would therefore give Alan even more excuses to complain; b) Jane is not really a fan of cross-dressing men and certainly doesn't want to be married to one. What next after Jane's shoes? Her underwear?
This is a line that does not want to be crossed!
Jane will have to hurry off now to hide her shoes, just in case Alan loses the run of himself in his fevered state .