Alan's blog........

Chat about anything you like... Fed up with the state of the world today? Tell us!
paul...m
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by paul...m » Mon Aug 10, 2020 7:41 pm

What no Jane again .

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maz
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by maz » Tue Aug 11, 2020 8:53 am

No, TUT. She is slacking.



But I hope all is ok and she just forgot. I know she knows we care, but we like to tease her too don't we?
Marilyn

paul...m
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by paul...m » Tue Aug 11, 2020 8:12 pm

Yes I hope all is well with her and family .

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maz
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by maz » Wed Aug 12, 2020 8:50 am

Really cuts down on our weekend fun though.
Marilyn

paul...m
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by paul...m » Wed Aug 12, 2020 11:01 am

very inconsiderate of Jane/Alan

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maz
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by maz » Thu Aug 13, 2020 8:52 am

Oh indeed it is. :wink:
Marilyn

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Janey Dal
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by Janey Dal » Sat Aug 15, 2020 2:20 pm

Jane offers her sincere apologies on Alan’s (whose blog this is) behalf. He is deffo slacking.

Jane however has a very good excuse for being missing in action. Jane is now a granny :D :D . Jane’s grandson Is called George Thomas and weighed a very impressive (but no doubt eye watering) 9 pounds 9 ounces :shock: :shock: :shock: .

Jane of course has only visited him every day since his arrival (not that Jane is besotted with him or anything like that). Jane is desperate to teach him his first rude word and naughty song and doesn’t want to miss an opportunity :shock: . Sadly George seems to prefer sleeping to rude conversations with his granny at the moment.

Jane has razzed on his hands and tickled his feet, but George remains happily napping :roll: :roll: . Jane even laughed to try to wake him up (Jane’s laugh is notorious for being a tad loud) but even that wasn’t sufficient. Jane could always whisper the rude songs into his ear whilst no one was looking to see if he remembers them when he starts to talk in a couple of weeks time (he is obviously going to be a very advanced developer :D ).

Mummy and Daddy are doing fine (not that anyone cares about them any more).

Mad Ma is now a great grandma and rather likes it. Jane thinks she may like to keep the baby in the family now he’s here. She thinks he might be a bit of fun.

Well when he bothers to wake up that is :? .

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maz
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by maz » Sun Aug 16, 2020 9:35 am

Marilyn sends a huge CONGRATULATIONS to Jane on reaching the esteemed status of Granny, she is really happy for Jane. Marilyn might even forgive her for not doing her duties with important things like this blog! However Marilyn is also happy that Jane, Alan(whose blog this is), Mad Ma, new mummy, daddy, baby George and anyone else there are healthy and now she and Paul can now stop worrying. Marilyn does hope that baby George enjoys all the Granny knitted items that have been bestowed on him.
Marilyn

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Janey Dal
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by Janey Dal » Sun Aug 16, 2020 12:01 pm

Jane thanks Marilyn for her good wishes :D .

Baby George is apparently unimpressed so far with his outfits. Jane will obviously have to try harder :shock: . He obviously has high standards.

Jane hopes his standards aren’t too high however as Jane may find her behaviour needs to change and she’s not sure she can do that :shock: .

paul..m
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by paul..m » Sun Aug 16, 2020 7:39 pm

Congratulations Jane pleased all is ok . If you try on kimono for George that might get a reaction , if it does then well done Alan for his forward thinking .
Paul

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Saxie
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by Saxie » Sun Aug 16, 2020 11:17 pm

Many congrats from me as well. I have 10 grandchildren and love them all to bits - all their parents complain I spoil them but have to agree that is what grandmothers are for

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Janey Dal
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by Janey Dal » Sat Aug 22, 2020 2:24 pm

Jane agrees entirely Saxie! Jane fully intends to indulge George at every opportunity :D . He already has his Grannie’s special jumpers to wear and indeed Grannie is on with another one in black and yellow stripes with the intention of frightening bees away from him because it will make him look like an enormous bee and not to be messed with :shock: .

Jane has been to see little G again today and yet again he was happy sleeping :shock: . Jane wants to have a conversation with him and ask him if he likes his jumpers but George is too busy zedding. Either that or he is pretending to sleep so he doesn’t have to tell his grannie that the jumpers are rubbish and he has refused to wear them outside of the house for fear of ridicule :shock: . Jane has no idea these days if babies think it is cool to wear their grannies knitted jumpers or not. Jane needs to get down with the babies :lol: :lol: .

Meanwhile in other events this week....... :shock:

Jane is not sure there have been any other events this week of any interest or significance other than George having his first bottle and his first bath - one was popular apparently, the other not so much :lol: :lol: .

Jane thinks George is going to be naturally cool as he is apparently totally unaware of the fuss he has created just by arriving.

Jane did manage however to take some time out of being a grannie by getting her nails done this morning. Jane has gone for bright orange with the intention of being a glamour(ish) grannie.

Alan (whose blog this is) has taken to being a Granda with alacrity. Jane has no idea where he got the alacrity from but he certainly has a lot of it, so maybe he bought it in bulk :D .

paul...m
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by paul...m » Sat Aug 22, 2020 4:59 pm

Should have had yellow and blck nails to match knitted jumper/kimono that would have scared all animals

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Janey Dal
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by Janey Dal » Sat Aug 29, 2020 1:54 pm

paul...m wrote:
Sat Aug 22, 2020 4:59 pm
Should have had yellow and blck nails to match knitted jumper/kimono that would have scared all animals
Actually Jane likes that idea :D :D .

A fairly boring week this week chez Dalgleish. Alan (whose blog this is) has not been so well so Jane can’t be rude to him in case he cries :shock: . Mad Ma hasn’t done anything particularly interesting apart from forcing Jane to have the same conversation with her about where to get her nails done. Jane has suggested 4 times that mad Ma uses the nail technician in the hairdressers she uses just round the corner from where she lives. Every time Jane suggests it mad Ma reacts as if it’s a new idea :roll: :roll:.

Mad Ma: “My nails are a mess!”

Jane: “Why don’t you try the nail technician in your hairdressers?”

Mad Ma: “Oh that’s a good idea!”

Three days later Jane has the same conversation....... :roll:

Jane and Alan however had the opportunity to babysit little G today whilst mummy went to get her eyelashes done (well it wasn’t like that when Jane was a new mum! You were lucky if you got out to buy a tomato without trailing the offspring with you :shock: :lol: :lol:). Daddy was working.

Jane has to say that that boy is going to be trouble! He definitely needs some discipline :shock: . He didn’t wake up ONCE to speak to his Granny and Granda. SO RUDE :shock: . Especially as they had gone over specially to see him :shock: .

He managed a few explosive farts as some light entertainment but that was it. Jane is going to have to have a quiet word with number one Digger son and advise that some strict rules need to be put in place asap or they will be sorry.

Jane did sing him his first rude song mind :oops: :oops: . However Jane doesn’t think he was really listening :roll: :roll: .

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Janey Dal
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Re: Alan's blog........

Post by Janey Dal » Sun Aug 30, 2020 10:55 am

Jane is unable to go and visit little G today because his other granny is meeting him for the first time :shock: :shock: .

He has another granny? Jane is not unique? That is just not on! Jane has no doubt that she will be favourite granny however :D . Indeed she will make sure of it by telling him his other granny is a witch and will cast a spell on him :lol: :lol: . There are no holds barred when there's a granny-off :shock: :shock: .

Jane is bigger than his other granny and also has a bigger handbag to hit her with. There will be no contest :D :D . Jane also suspects his other granny wears big granny knickers which Jane would never do :shock: . Even if she doesn't Jane will sneak into her garden and hang some on the washing line just to make sure little G knows the truth (or Jane's version of it anyway).

Jane lives much nearer to little G than his other granny so will take advantage of whispering things in his ear about her at any given opportunity:

"She eats babies for breakfast", "She has smelly feet and long toenails to scratch you with", "She has a wart on her bum with a hair growing out of it".

Prior to little G's arrival Jane and granny number 2 got on perfectly well, but that situation is now untenable and the proverbial gloves are off :shock: :shock: . Of course Jane cannot admit to granny number 2 that they are now at war. Naturally that would be very un-British and rude. But Jane will take every opportunity to diss granny number 2 without her knowledge :twisted: :twisted: .

Jane will dish the dirt with alacrity and without conscience or any adherence to the truth :lol: :lol: .

Or Jane might take the moral high ground and allow granny number 2 to share little G. It's a dilemma :shock: :shock: .

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