A little ditty

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Foxysally
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Location: West Sussex, South of England

Re: A little ditty

Post by Foxysally » Wed Nov 29, 2017 5:33 am

A young lady in terrible pain
Pleaded with doctors in vain
Till they said "not a crisis
You have pancreatitis
Take Creon, you'll be right as rain"
Sarah

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Janey Dal
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Location: Stockton on Tees, NE UK.

Re: A little ditty

Post by Janey Dal » Wed Nov 29, 2017 11:58 am

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

You all make me laugh.

Loved your story Paul about Argos :lol: :lol: . I am sure you are all aware I get mental pictures and that one was fab! :lol: :lol:

There was a young lady from Thrace
Whose corsets would no longer lace
Her mother said “Nelly,
There’s more in your belly
Than even went in through your face”

Hugs

Jane 😘

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Foxysally
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Location: West Sussex, South of England

Re: A little ditty

Post by Foxysally » Wed Nov 29, 2017 1:50 pm

:lol: :lol:
This whole thread is making me laugh (apart from Sacha's lack of cake!)


A lady who hails from the sticks
Had an illness that knocked her for six
With the help of this forum
She shed all decorum
And rejoiced in bowel movements like bricks
Sarah

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stuart13
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Location: The English Lakes

Re: A little ditty

Post by stuart13 » Wed Nov 29, 2017 4:31 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol:

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stuart13
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Location: The English Lakes

Re: A little ditty

Post by stuart13 » Wed Nov 29, 2017 4:45 pm

There was a young man who sinned
'cause of his very bad wind
Could tell from the smell
that he wasn't quite well
So I didn't have heart
to complain of his part.

:wink:

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paul.m
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Location: Fenland

Re: A little ditty

Post by paul.m » Wed Nov 29, 2017 6:40 pm

Good job this forum is not rated as in films or this would a 18 but laughing is good medicine .
Jane should have been a cake decorating shop then it could have been four candles

Mary had a little Lamb
That she thought was very silly
So she threw it up in the air
And caught it by the ****y
Paul

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Janey Dal
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Location: Stockton on Tees, NE UK.

Re: A little ditty

Post by Janey Dal » Fri Dec 01, 2017 11:12 am

I have to say that I am impressed with your rhyming skills Sarah!

You could be the next Pam Ayres or Roald Dahl.

Hugs

Jane 😘

This bloody iPad does my head in. It seems to have a mission in life to change every word I type. It guesses and usually gets it wrong and then I have to go and edit the word and it fights with me :shock: :shock: .

Does it not know I have an A level in English (which is more than it every achieved)! :twisted: :twisted: :lol: :lol:

Sorry! this little rant was as a result of it changing Roald to Ronald! Who has EVER heard of Ronald Dahl? :roll: :roll:

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paul.m
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Re: A little ditty

Post by paul.m » Sat Dec 02, 2017 6:05 am

Does Ronald McDonald change to yes please
Paul

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MikeyB
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Location: Isle of Mull, Scotland

Re: A little ditty

Post by MikeyB » Sat Dec 02, 2017 7:44 am

There was once a frisky duck
Who though he was really in luck
A female paddled by
With a glint in her eye
And said “fancy a cup of tea?”

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Janey Dal
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Location: Stockton on Tees, NE UK.

Re: A little ditty

Post by Janey Dal » Sat Dec 02, 2017 1:19 pm

:lol: :lol:

There once was a very nice fellow
Whose skin became very yellow
They said “It’s your liver,
It’s starting to wither
and Saint Peter is saying Hello :roll: :roll:

Hugs

Jane 😘

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Foxysally
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Location: West Sussex, South of England

Re: A little ditty

Post by Foxysally » Mon Dec 04, 2017 1:32 am

:lol: :lol:

Everyone on here is very talented and funny!

Jane, when I was a primary school child I was horribly precocious and used to insist on staying in every playtime to write poetry. For some reason my teacher of the time humoured me and even furnished me with endless exercise books for the purpose. I spent a good few years writing constant poetry. I used to tell everyone I was going to be the poet laureate when I grew up. I was deadly serious, too.

Then the teenage years hit and I discovered boys and bike sheds. That set me right :lol:

There once was a lady who said
"I cannot eat brandy or bread
A nice Christmas cake
Is beyond me to bake
I'll make them all sprout soup instead"
Sarah

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Sacha
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Location: Sunderland, N. East England

Re: A little ditty

Post by Sacha » Fri Dec 08, 2017 6:01 pm

When I started this thread I had no idea how talented you all were!
Glad it is giving enjoyment and laughs :)

Sacha

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Janey Dal
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Re: A little ditty

Post by Janey Dal » Sat Dec 09, 2017 11:31 am

Fab! I love this type of poetry. All that rubbish we did at school with Keats and all the other boring gits does my head in.

Iambic pentameters my bottom!

This is proper poetry. I am glad you didn’t become the Poet Laureate Sarah -think of all this fun we would have missed :lol: :lol: and those boys in the bike sheds as well :lol: :lol: .

A gentleman dining in Crewe
Found a rather large mouse in his stew
Said the waiter “Don’t shout,
Or wave it about,
Or the rest will be wanting one too.”

I have to say that only the ‘liver’ rhyme was mine - the others I’ve found in my memory banks

Hugs

Jane xx

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Re: A little ditty

Post by vaperknightcomment » Wed Jan 10, 2018 7:27 am

Great Poetry you have here!

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chandra
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Re: A little ditty

Post by chandra » Thu Jan 11, 2018 9:56 am

Think you should all stick to your day jobs :lol: :lol: :lol:

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